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Is there no way out of the mind?

November 27, 2009

“I can never read all the books I want; I can never be all the people I want and live all the lives I want. I can never train myself in all the skills I want. And why do I want? I want to live and feel all the shades, tones and variations of mental and physical experience possible in life. And I am horribly limited.”

I want everything and i want nothing.  I am a great lump of indecisiveness and nothing rings more true to me right now than the above quote by Sylvia Plath.  I feel that by wanting so much whilst simultaneously demanding simplicity from my life i am missing out on much more than i realise.  Do i live and teach in France for the next year or stay at home and save money? Do i save to be a hairdresser and be guaranteed residency in Australia or stay at home and work myself to death for a degree in something worthwhile? Is the life i dream of really what i want or is my perception influenced by the friends i keep?  What is life without friends anyway?  I think a decision based on friendship is as valid as any other factor.   It’s almost painful trying to figure out what i want from my life.

Dear Santa, all i want for Christmas is some patience. (or £10,ooo..?)

:C

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